The outlandish world of holiday complaints

Not many people can claim (or would want to!) they have been sent a photograph of a poo for their job!  But if you have ever worked in the customer relations department of a major tour operator – as I did for my first ‘proper’ job – it would seem that anything goes!

Poo-gate, or more-tellingly the ‘who dunnit’ photograph was accompanied by a letter detailing that when they [the holidaymakers] returned to their room from a day out, they found someone else’s poo in their toilet. To prove it wasn’t theirs, they took a photo and sent it to yours truly! So how do you go about investigating that one?

From murky stuff to the we-need-our-hands-holding: ‘I can’t believe we got bitten by mosquitoes: we were not warned in the holiday brochure.’ And yes I am referring to far-flung, exotic locations, not a beach in England! To people who like to examine the neighbouring tables’ breakfasts: ‘The table next to me had three sausages with their breakfast and I only had two.’ Or:  ‘The people on the other side had three teabags in their pot and I only had one!’   Whether absurd, suspicious or downright implausible, I had to politely answer them all; including that ‘good’ old British attitude of expecting everyone else to speak the lingo: ‘I can’t believe the taxi driver in Prague didn’t speak English! This has totally ruined our holiday.’

Don’t get me wrong, amongst these, there were some serious issues which were truly awful and which you would stop at nothing to resolve, but funnily enough it is mostly the preposterous ones that stick in your mind!

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